Can You Milk Me, Focker?

>:-o Ai Leche! That translates to milk, but it's a term used on Guam for emphasis. It's also the phrase that came to mind when I found out about the nazis at Myspace.
Yes, Myspace - the internet sensation made popular by high schoolers, egomaniacs and bored office workers. Myspace has been known to sever relationships, cause restraining orders to be filed, and now starve babies! Ok, maybe not quite, but the networking site has removed pictures of Melissa Rock breast feeding two little Rocks on her page. The reason? Myspace believes the images are "too sexual". Rocks, a mother of three from Tacoma, said she reposted the pictures and again, they were taken down. DENIED! The Myspace powers that be even threatened to delete her profile.

If you have ever been on Myspace, then you are familiar with the different types of pictures on the site.

1. There is the "funny picture": usually something outlandish like this JFC - T Shirt;

2. The "self-portrait": taken by oneself using a camera phone or in the mirror;

3. The "b!tch pic": photos of pets dressed in cutesy costumes (did you know there is a site called dogster?!?!?!);

4. The "club picture": taken at the club or before the club; and then there is

5. The "bedroom picture": pictures where the subject is wearing little or nothing and is usually in a compromising pose, trying desperately to bring sexy back.

A friend of mine dated a guy who had 10 pictures of himself SHIRTLESS on his page - too bad none of them relayed how short he is. In some of those h0mophotos, he's laying on the bed (SHIRTLESS). This same a$$ clown had pictures of girls that were rejected from a 2 Live Crew video shoot on his "friends" section. But I digress . . . FOCUS! This post is not about vanity smurf, it's about the cockos at Myspace who think that a picture of some attention-craving hoochie dropping down, getting her eagle on and showing her beef curtains is less sexual than a picture of a woman feeding her babies.

God knew what he was doing when He put milk in the mammories. Scientists have been researching breast milk for decades and numerous studies confirm that mama's milk is perfectly suited to nourish infants and protect them from illness. It contains just the right amount of fatty acids, lactose, water, and amino acids that are good for digestion, brain development, and growth. Not only is it natural, but It saves money too! Shoot, we should all start putting some of this stuff in our morning cup of coffee and bowl of Special K! Aaaand, breast feeding makes babies grow into happier and class-upwardly mobile people. P.Diddy drinks breast milk from a Cambodian immigrant and so should you! =D I can go on and on about the benefits of breast feeding, but I have a feeling none of my readers *two of you* are contemplating whether to use Similac or breast milk . . .

When I was about 11, right after my cousin was born, my aunt used to sit at the dinner table with us and after she was done eating, she'd pick up the baby, sit back down at the table, whip out a nip and latch my cousin onto it *all in one fell swoop*. I felt soooo uncomfortable just sitting there, but got over it - It's kind of like talking to someone with a lazy eye or a lady with a Burt Reynolds mustache.

So to those of you brainacs on the Myspace Orwellian board, leave Melissa Rocks and her page alone. Pop your momma's TT's out your mouth and grow up! You allow 15 year old girls to put pictures of their barely covered Nipsy Russels on their pages! Shame on you for making such a natural, beautiful act seem dirty. Don't make Melissa Rocks pay for the fact that you weren't hugged enough as a child.